My Heart

There was a moment in the hospital when Baby Sam was crying. It was only my second or third time to even see my sweet boy. As I held him in my arms, I talked to him. He stopped crying, opened his little eyes and looked at me. And I could see it in his eyes. He knew me. It was like he was saying, "Oh, there you are. I know you. I know that voice." He stared at me for a couple of minutes before drifting back off to sleep. Oh, the love.

Thank you for praying for Baby Sam.

I said before that I don't know if it has really "hit met" yet. That our baby is here. That our baby is healed. Yesterday, I needed to go back to Dr. Fancy for a checkup for myself. Before I got to the exam room I stopped off at the restroom. And it hit me. The last time I was in that restroom I was looking in the mirror at my swollen, teary-eyed, mascara-stained face, moments after being told that my baby's heart looked dilated and that there might be something wrong. But this time? This time as I looked in that mirror I realized. I realized that while Dr. Fancy was right and there was something wrong with my baby's heart, he has been healed. And he is here. And he is healthy. And as I made my way back to the exam room and sat waiting, I heard a baby's doppler heartbeat through the wall in the room next door. I am so glad that my baby is here.

Thank you for flooding the gates of Heaven with your prayers.

Today our sweet Sam is one week old. This is what I hoped and prayed for, but he wasn't "supposed" to be home with us yet. At least according to the doctors. He was "supposed" to be in the NICU waiting for heart surgery for an undecided number of defects. But he's home. I'm "supposed" to be pumping every three hours for our baby so he can be fed in the NICU. But I get to nurse him whenever he's hungry.

Thank you for spreading the word and getting people from all over to pray for him.

Yesterday, the NICU decided it would not allow children under 12 in to visit during flu season. And while this sounds like a very smart idea (!!) this would have been sad for Emma. But now she gets to hug and kiss him whenever she wants. Because he is home.

Thank you for your thoughts, your words, your comments, and your support.

Sometimes I can't believe that it's all real. That our Baby Sam is here. I always thought he was my miracle in the first place just because of my MTHFR, but I never imagined he'd be part of something so big! I am so amazed to be by his side as he is a miracle. God has big plan for our boy and this is just the beginning. I believe God promised me this child a long time ago, this very child, and I am in awe that he is here. To God be all the glory!!

From the very most bottom part of my heart, thank you all (yes, you in the bloggy world) for your love, support, and most importantly for your prayers. We are blessed beyond measure.